9 Months
by elisaday16
Summary: A vampire pregnancy can be quite disturbing ... BxE both vampires AU T for language
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Long time no see, Fanfiction. Now trying Twilight.**

**Story: Bella is pregnant. And pissed.**

**Both Edward and Bella are vampires in this and there is no pain/oddness/weird growing thing about that baby. Nine months. Have fun … Edward.**

**And you too people ****J**

**OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

Edward cautiously stepped towards the bathroom door and knocked, twice.

"Bella, are you alright, my love?"

Although the toilet flush was loud Bella's growl drowned it completely … even for human ears.

"I'm telling you, Edward, if you don't shut the fuck up right now I'm going to kick your sissy ass all the way down the hallway!"

Gagging.

Her husband's brow furrowed. "Bella …", he began, grabbing the doorknob.

"Edward Cullen! Don't you dare open that door!", she yelled. Pause. Gagging. "I. Am. Puking. And I swear on my mother's apple pie if you open that door I will puke all over you goddamn face!"

The male vampire gulped.

"But how can I help you, Bella? There's got to be a -"

Bella's furious words cut off his pleading. "Just leave me the fuck alone", she warned him. "Go hunt a squirrel or something …"

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Edward jumped when his wife stepped out of the bathroom after nearly an hour. She eyed him with narrowed eyes, craning her neck in an almost arrogant way.

"God, Edward, you're such a stalker." Her words were unusually cold and his eyes saddened visibly.

And, still, he had to smile at his wife. In spite of the pissed off expression on her face she still looked more beautiful than ever with the small bump of her stomach already noticeable and her hands resting on her hips.

Edward was now standing in front of his wife, staring at her with a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. The brunette vampire growled quietly.

"Stop staring …", she muttered but the angry tone had slightly ceased. She shifted uncomfortably. "And don't you touch me. I'm ugly."

Her eyes widened as he took a step forward.

"Edward … I'm warning you …" Her voice was a nervous hissing. Edward was grinning now.

Another step.

She put up a hand in front of her, between Edward and herself.

"No, no, no! You did this to me. You're not getting any of this anytime soon. Nah-ah! Go cuddle the wall … I am _not_ available right now! Back off I swear -"

But he had already slung his arms around her tiny frame, pulling her to himself. The vampire planted a soft kiss on his wife's forehead, laughing at the growl it caused.

Edward nuzzled her neck. Much to her distress.

"Would you growl if I kissed you?" His whispered words in her ear still sent a shiver down her spine.

Bella gave him her best glare and tried to push away from her husband but she failed. Long gone were the new born days …

His chuckle rang in her ears, making her sigh unwillingly. She looked at him accusingly.

Edward grinned apologetically and intertwined his large hands with hers as he leaned closer to her flawless face.

"You know I'm going to scream 'Rape' at the top of my lungs …", Bella huffed but the gorgeous vampire kept leaning closer until his lips finally captured hers.

Despite her earlier protests she quickly wrenched her delicate hands from his grasp and tangled them in soft hair. He grinned into the kiss.

"You pretty aggressive for a pregnant lady …", Edward muttered in amusement.

"Oh shut the fuck up and take me to the bedroom already!"

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

**Reviiiiiiew :D **


	2. Chapter 2

Edward wrinkled his nose in disgust as he entered their new bought house. He had been looking for a decent job all morning and was now looking forward to spending time with his wife.

But instead of being greeted with the wonderful smell of her hair and the delicious scent she usually shed in the house by simply living there he was greeted with something repulsive crawling up his nose.

Definitely something human.

The pale vampire followed the smell slowly, sniffing carefully. It wasn't hard to find her. The roaring loud 80's music coming from the kitchen was quite helpful, too.

His eyes widened slightly as he reached the door frame of the kitchen.

There she was, his Bella, his wife, the _vampire_, sitting cross-legged on the marble kitchen floor, stuffing her mouth with as much strawberry jelly as possible.

"Ehm … Bella?"

As if the to emphasize the confusion in his voice, Bella looked up to see her husband's face practically screaming 'What the fuck?!' at her.

She grinned widely at him, waving a jelly-covered hand in his direction. He frowned.

"How was your day? Any success?"

Aha. It was one of her 'nice' days apparently. The vampire blinked.

"Ehm, no … the offered jobs were just … unacceptable … but tell -"

Her overly sweet voice interrupted him. "Edward, you should really start being a little more tolerant. You seem upset, what is it?" There was an accusing hint to it.

He gaped at Bella who kept licking jelly of her fingers. "You're a vampire", he burst out and looked at his wife expectantly.

The brunette on the floor raised her delicate brow. Annoyance clouded her features. "So what?"

The puzzled vampire gestured wildly with hands, ending up with his finger pointed at the half-empty jelly glass.

"You're eating Jelly! Food! For no reason! _Jelly_!" The words stumbled from his lips in a second and his eyes looked bewildered. Silence.

The quiet popping sound of Bella licking off another finger filled the room. She sighed, getting up from the cold floor.

"Just look at the texture, Edward!" The words were desperate as she wagged the jelly glass in front of his face. "You _so_ need to try this stuff. It's all gibberish … and jelly-like … it's fantastic!"

"Jelly-like." Edward paused. "Bella, you're insane. I've always been concerned about your sanity … but this is it: You have gone insane."

The pregnant woman pouted slightly while trying to pull her hand out of the jelly glass. His attempt not to smile at this failed hopelessly and his face broke into a wide grin.

"You're unbelievable, Bella"

"Well, you're the one who got me pregnant … I think."

Edward growled as he reached for her pale hand. "Not funny. I think I deserve a kiss for that cruel behaviour of yours."

Her eyes gleamed. "You'll be covered in jelly."

The 17-year-old smirked slightly, pulling her hand. "I don't mind."

"You're not going to like it."

His eyebrows raised. "It's not like I haven't had more disgusting things in my mouth before."

Bella's eyes narrowed as he swung her into his arms. "What do you mean?"

Her beloved chuckle rang out next to her ear and stroke a strand of hair from her worried face.

"That, my love, is for me to know and for you to find out", he answered in amusement as he walked towards their bathroom.

She pinched his nose painfully, her beautiful eyes narrowing even further.

"Tell me what you meant this instant! I'm going to find out anyways … Edward!" She screeched as he kicked the door open with his foot and shut it behind them the same way.

The muffled sound of the water filling the bath tub got through the door, combined with Bella's threatening complaints.

"Edward … I'm warning you …"

Laughter. "Shut up, love, I'm washing this stuff of off you."

"_Edward!!"_

_Splash. _


End file.
